Recently I’ve started to feel like I’m living my life for others. Organising what I want to do around things I have decided to/want to/have to do for others.
More often than not I find myself putting what I want to do aside in order to do something for someone else, and make them happy. Noble? No, not really…Seeing others happy usually makes me happy. So it’s selfish in a way.
But I’m growing tired of making decisions.
I listened to a speech late last year at work. The speaker presented very well, and with a passion I had never seen from an Australian Executive before. This probably has a lot to do with the fact that he was south American. Anyway, he mentioned that we only go out of our way to achieve a goal when we truly believe that goal is good for us.
Of course he related what he was saying to work, and the speech was a spin made in order to motivate us during a time where my company is planning the removal of several perks, and a lack of monetary incentive for any of it’s employees.
But relate it to real life and it’s a strong statement. Everyone, even those that help the unfortunate, do the things they do because deep down they believe that the end goal will be good for them. Help the unfortunate because they believe it’s a good thing to do, end of story? Dig deeper. Does one gain a sense of self satisfaction because they believe they’re helping the world?
So we decide to do things when we believe those things are good for us. But, for example, what happens when you’ve been working hard towards a goal in your working life, and every time that goal seems close the posts move? What if your job is extremely convenient and enables some good things in your life, but due to a lack of movement prevents other things from being realised? When do you jump?
You’ve got to weigh up the pro’s and con’s, then make a decision.
I wish I could sit on the fence for this one. It looks comfy up there.
4 Comments
Oh man! This was the conversation in my head about 4 years ago! We’re in some parallel time warp!
The fact that I KNOW that what I do all day helps no one is exactly what makes it feel like the corporate prison from hell. I can spend entire weekends at work, and what does that achieve right now? People get to buy tools. Whoopdie… All that time for that?
As for the moving goal posts, I used to chase mine in a very same position as yours for many a year. I eventually met all my goals in natural progress. As long as your moving, you’ll get there. If you’re stuck in the corner in a place that likes to dangle the carrot, then it’s time to move on because someone else out there will be willing to throw you that bone.
In 5 years of sitting in my large corporation, I went backwards. In one year of leaving, I made it to where I wanted to go, and by two and a half years after that I was top of the food chain on double the money. The fence gets too comfortable sometimes.
I think I’m in that place where they like to dangle the carrot. Every time I’m about to jump they let me nibble though, and like a mouse I stay to see if I’ll get more of a bite soon.
What a time to be going through this. Mortgage, global financial crisis, IT losing money…my material desires. I feel like going out onto the back veranda and yelling, “FUCK YOU WORLD!” right now. I think I would feel a little better, then embarrassed, and then concerned that I had woken the neighborhood with such an expression.
I’m feeling the same pain mate. It’s because of the economic downturn that they get even cockier than usual. They think your their puppet if you have no where else to go.
I know I have to get out of my current situation, and I know that I can do it yet again pretty easy. It’s just a matter of being able to do it before I really do something I regret (and I’m way too close to the edge), and being worried about walking straight into the same trap yet again. Previous scars have left me too picky, and I called my own fate where I am a good 8 months ago. I hate it when I’m right.
It’s one of those things where we see that the cheese has moved, but we sit there asking where it went. Hoping it’ll come back/believing we can make it come back instead of leaving the comfort of something we know and actually finding new cheese.